Adolescence is sometimes considered the hardest part of life. Three young women shared their thoughts about how they cope when life gets too confronting.

Khya Boney, 16, and Tara Davies, 18 felt that friendship can be the rudder to steer from tough times.

“Usually it depends on the severity. If it’s really bad, I just try to find a drive; school or something. Just hang out with friends. It gets your mind off things,” Khya said.

“If I’ve got my closest friend, I can talk to them about everything. They can help me through the tough times,” Tara agreed.

Mehi-McIntrye Mental Health manager, Leigh Philpott stressed that talking about feelings or personal problems is critical when life seems overwhelming. 

“We need to be talking about these things long before they become huge problems for people,” he said.

“By having those conversations when people are well, and helping people feel comfortable about talking about these sorts of things, then that helps build people’s resilience, but also helps them feel more comfortable getting help when they need it.”

Brady-Lee Halloran is 18, and said she delves within herself to find a release from stress, like screaming into a pillow.

“I don’t like burdening people with my issues, so I just sort of do something to take my mind off it.” 

Brady-Lee said sometimes a violent anger wells up in her, and she craves an outlet.

“I think if there was anywhere I was going to deal with a situation, I’d probably do boxing, where you can lash out on a bag,” she said.

Leigh said everybody has different ways to cope with hardship.

“As long as that way of coping doesn’t negatively impact on the rest of their life,” he said. 

“If it’s something that helps you, makes you feel good about yourself, helps you build resilience, I think it’s ok.”

With the perspective of years lived, residents at McLean Care shared ways they have dealt with hard times.

Retired farmer and accountant Anthony Bucknell, 74, is coping with the loss of a leg. 

“I study on the computer, I suppose. Stocks and shares and that sort of thing,” he said. “That’s what I do. It makes it much easier.”

Mavis Tozer, 87, has faced many challenges. One of 11 children with few modern conveniences, raised primarily by her mother while her father fought overseas, Mavis went on to become an Inverell Shire councillor for 18 years, and served as shire president. 

“Somehow you just go through it,” she said. 

Dot Finauthty, 89, is London-born. She survived the Blitz, and recalled nights in the Anderson shelter in the back garden with V1 flying bombs above her. It was a frightening part of life. Considering that time, she was also philosophical about bouncing back.

“You just have to get on with it really. Just keep going and get though it. I don’t think you’ve got any choice, really.”

This point of view is not unusual according to Leigh.

“The more things you’ve been through, you build up your resilience, because you learn ways of getting through,” he said.

On the other end of life, some IDFS Kindamindi preschool youngsters shared simple activities that gave them joy. 

Campbell Quartley is 5. He said using his camera makes him happy.

“That you get to take photos of your own,” he said.

“Play on the computer, and I get to play Purple Place!” shouted Flo Black. 

“Play princesses, and hide and seek,” added four-year-old Milly Marshall.

Henry Ross-Ballinger, 5, has a young fox terrier. He said when he feels a little down, he plays with his dog. 

“He comes to me ‘cause I petted him a lot, and he loves me a lot,” he said smiling.

If you need to talk to somebody, you can call Lifeline: 13 11 14, MensLine: 1300 789 978, Beyondblue: 1300 224 636 and for children, the Kids Helpline: 1800 551 800.